The unfinished red

Red belly

I was rehearsing for a few weeks in the milk bar and created an improvised wonderful little piece of art. Unfortunately, there will be no public showing. There was just that one day where I performed it to myself. My belly is about to deflate and the magic and insight I felt while performing is lost and remembered forever.

I wish I could work on it more, I wish I knew how to work on it more, I wish I knew how to make an evening length show with all the pieces I created, performed and in addition materialize some of my ever burning and changing ideas. I wish I knew how to be persistent, excited and persevered in developing my art. The truth is, I don’t know how. As soon as I try to dive more into one of my pieces, I lose interest and meet resistance. I meet meaninglessness, boredom and doubt. I want to break through that resistance but I also honor it and understand its source.

Until this very moment the only place where I can stay with that is in between. In between acceptance and anger. Sometimes that is a very good place to be. Inspiring and thriving. In other times it feels depressing, sad and lonely. I guess the way out of that dilemma is finding an intention of why I want to perform. A real, honest and clear reason or at least one I believe in.

In the ‘unfinished red’ I recited that the first few months of pregnancy were at times so irritating because I was surprised about the lack of obvious side-effects, but especially about the lack of emotions. I realized I was judging the harmony this baby and I seemed to have found immediately…
After I said these words, I danced a duet with the little sprout that is growing inside of me. A duet that was entirely co-created in the spirit of collaborating and guiding equally. It was (and still is!) such a pleasure and loving experience to feel the impulses from inside and transfering them to the external world.

 

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Spiderlips

Today I performed in a circle of women sharing stories of life. We all performed because we feel the healing power in that way of sharing and communing with each other and the real treasure to do it together.  I feel what we do and say on a stage like this becomes more valuable and deep, and that multiplied by an audience honestly witnessing makes it even stronger. These instant compositions can open windows to our hearts, minds and embodied values. It is created art by real life, and to witness the humanity, the depth, humor and artistry that might emerge is pure pleasure.

Bodytales ® is certainly not for everyone but it is worth a try if you want to start something new.

This text emerged shortly before our show started. It popped out during our “warm-up” and I used it for my first very short piece.
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Das Festival

Das Butoh Festival hat gestern angefangen. Wir maskierten uns ein wenig und dann ging es in die Stadt. Die Reaktionen der Einheimischen waren sehr ehrlich, fast wie Kinder, die Ausserirdische sehen.  Die Reaktionen der Touris waren anders, ganz anders. Manche waren genervt, andere wiederum taten so als wuessten sie alles ueber Butoh, viele ignorierten uns. Aber es gab auch welche, die tatsaechlich zu den Workshops kommen wollen.

(um das Bild in voller Groesse zu sehen einfach draufklicken.)